When your status as an expatriate spouse impacts your self-confidence and prevents you from finding your rightful place

The status as an expatriate spouse impacts your self-confidence.

Today, I’d like to write to you about the impact of your status as an expatriate spouse on your self-confidence, knowing that this may be what’s preventing you from daring to find your rightful place and your balance as an expatriate spouse.

The reason I wanted to talk to you about this is that the vast majority of expatriate spouses who start a coaching program with me lack self-confidence. And this lack of self-confidence is often what prevents them from daring to embark on a personal or professional transition.


Expatriate spouses have very interesting backgrounds and experiences.

Yet they all have very interesting backgrounds: they’ve had a wealth of experiences and developed many skills, especially through their lives as expatriate spouses. Just like you, I’m sure, even if you think otherwise right now.

Probably that today, you too, you don’t see your added value anymore. And you only see what you haven’t done yet!

And that’s logical! And why is that?

Because when you took on the role of expatriate spouse, you found yourself with a strange label on your forehead that had, and probably still has, a big impact on your self-confidence. For years, you’ve been seen as:

  • The housewife who has a privileged life abroad (and who certainly has no right to complain)!
  • “The wife of…” and/or “The mother of…”, because no one really wants to know and understand who’s behind your status as a spouse.

No one seem to be clearly aware of your key role in the success of your partner’s and your family’s expatriation. Your role is not valued at all, you’re often misunderstood, and you feel isolated confronted with many challenges when trying to find your rightful place and your personal or professional balance.

The result is that little by little, you too, begin to define yourself by this label, and you can’t get away from it! This has an impact not only on your self-confidence, but on your self-esteem too!

Do you relate? If so, what can you do about it?


The expat spouse’s role is full of stereotypes, misunderstanding and lack of recognition.

As I said recently in the webinar, I hosted for CoCreate Humanity (here’s the replay on Youtube): the key is to reconnect with your adventurous side, that part of you that lies dormant inside you, the one that has proven time and time again that you’re a resourceful person!

You may be wondering what I’m talking about. But remember when you decided to leave your country, your job, your loved ones… you didn’t take the easy way out, you made a courageous decision, you dared what the vast majority wouldn’t! You chose to embark on an adventure despite the social, professional, and personal costs involved. You wanted to break out of your glass ceiling, to experience something new, different, and atypical.

And from there, I bet you took charge of everything. You took on an essential role in all the logistical and family aspects, to guarantee the success of this expatriation and the well-being of the whole family, including your partner.

And for this, you have shown leadership, creativity, resilience, and many other skills.

What you need now is to reconnect with that part of you that has proven its ability to adapt and rise to challenges!

How do you do this?


The key is to reconnect with your inner adventurer!

Start by taking stock of how satisfied you are today in all areas of your life. Also identifying your needs and how to meet them. And clarifying your desires, your values… revealing all your treasures: your experiences, your successes, your skills, your qualities, your strengths and all those pearls that have been slumbering inside you since you took on the role of accompanying spouse.

By reconnecting to this part of yourself, you’ll be able to draw on your own resources, and this is what will enable you to dare to take back the reins, to dare to relaunch yourself professionally, to dare to find your rightful place, the one you’ve chosen and defined because it allows you to blossom and be happy, despite the challenges of your life as an expatriate spouse.

By reconnecting with your inner Captain, you’ll regain your self-confidence! This is essential, because it’s probably your lack of self-confidence that’s your main obstacle to daring to fulfill your desires and needs, and to daring, if you so wish, to open a new professional chapter.

And don’t forget that having confidence in yourself means inspiring others to have confidence in you! If you don’t believe in yourself, who will? You need this self-confidence to realize the projects that are close to your heart!

Does it make sense to you?

This is the path I offer to all the expatriate spouses I accompany, and that’s why I know how important it is. If you feel the need to be accompanied to help you reconnect with that adventurous part of yourself, contact me so that together we can assess whether this is the investment you need today to regain your self-confidence and dare to make that personal or professional transition you’ve been wanting to make for a while, but didn’t dare go too far towards yet!

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